


Confusion And Perfect Smiles

by vhelz_roxanne



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Bang Chan is Whipped, Bang Chan-centric, Coming Out, Confusion, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Woochan centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-10-25 06:32:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17719964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vhelz_roxanne/pseuds/vhelz_roxanne
Summary: Chan is confused about so many things. The only thing he is sure about is his love for his friends and his girlfriend so when Mina breaks up with him he is lost but maybe someone can help him find his way back and help him find the answers to all his questions.A woochan centric fic with a slight hint of the other ships.





	Confusion And Perfect Smiles

Chan wasn't sure he loved a lot of things.  
He wasn't sure he loved the course he was majoring in.  
He wasn't sure he loved the colour his hair was.  
He wasn't sure he loved the place he stayed at.  
He wasn't sure he loved the boring routine he followed.

He wasn't sure he loved so many things as much as he claimed he did but he was sure about two things.  
He was sure he loved his group of friends and his girlfriend.

So when Mina broke up with him in front of the library where they were supposed to have their weekly study date session Chan was hit with a realisation and he wasn't sure he ever really loved the girl.  
Sure she was sweet, caring, funny too once she opened up but Chan wasn't sure he loved her romantically.  
The thing that really broke Chan's walls of beliefs though was the reason why Mina broke up with him.  
"Chan you're gay." Said guy just stared at his now former girlfriend.  
"What? No I-" He tried to explain but Mina cut him.  
"Chan you don't need to hide it. I see the way you look at boys, I see the way you look at one of your bestfriends. It's the same look Sana has when she looks at Dahyun or when Minho looks at Jisung" She explained, a soft smile appearing on her face making Chan even more confused. She didn't look mad in fact she looked like she was pitying him.  
"It's okay if you can't come out yet. I'll keep a secret. I'll still be your friend Chan. Have a good day." She kissed his cheek out of habit before excusing herself as she walked inside the library.

Chan wasn't sure how long he stood in front on the library, he was still trying to process everything that happened. He didn't even notice that someone else was in front of him until they clapped their hands in front of Chan's face.  
"Oi mate are you okay?" Asked a really deep voice and Chan finally snapped out from his thoughts. He blinked a couple of times and focused on the people in front of him.  
"Felix, Jisung what are you guys doing here?" He asked confused after all the library wasn't a place the two "twins" liked to be in.  
"We were looking for you. It's almost lunch time and you were nowhere to be found. Woojin hyung was starting to get worried" Jisung explained, his arm sliding on Chan's shoulder as they start to make their way to the cafeteria.

The day quickly passed but Mina's words were still running through his head. His friends could see that something was bothering Chan but no one dared asking.

That was until Changbin snapped. They were all sitting around a table in their favorite bubble tea place. Everyone participated in the various conversations jumping from one topic to another. They were pretty loud but thankfully the place was relatively empty and the employees were their friends. Chan was the only one who didn't say anything at all since they've sat down and Changbin was starting to get irritated. When they tried to ask him something he wouldn't reply and would just stare in front of him, lost in his thought. So when Changbin finally slammed a fist on the table no one was really surprised except for Chan.  
"Hyung what the hell is wrong with you?" Changbin asked, everyone was quiet and kept looking at Changbin then at Chan waiting for the oldest reply. Felix was the only one that focused on Changbin, he tried to calm him by rubbing his arm softly whispering to calm down.  
"No Felix, Chan hyung has been ignoring us all day since lunch time, I just wanna know why!" He shouted startling Felix who shrinked away finding comfort in Jeongin's arms.  
Woojin as the the oldest in their group of friend felt like he had to intervene and that's what he did.  
"Changbin calm down. That's not how you talk to someone older than you." Changbin looked at him beforing sighing loudly and leaning on his seat, his arms crossed in front of his chest.  
"Chan can you tell us what's wrong? You've been spacing out all day and we're worried" Woojin said, his tone was way more calm than Changbin's but Chan could tell he really was worried.  
"Guys... sorry I worried you. It's nothing really" He finally said as he lowered his head and mumbled something.  
"Sorry hyung what?" Asked Seungmin, even though he was the closest one sitting to Chan he couldn't understand his last words.  
"I said I broke up with Mina, or more like she broke up with me" Chan said this time louder. His friends started saying sorry and Changbin apologized for his outburst but Minho was the one who asked the question they all wanted to know.  
"Why? Why did you break up? You looked happy"  
"That's... that's what..." Chan sighed loudly "Honestly I don't know, she told me something that got me thinking but right now I don't think I'm ready yet to say why" He looked at his friends begging them not to ask any more questions and Woojin was the one that understood first so he stood up and walked toward Chan before enveloping him in a bear hug.  
"We are here for you, you can tell us when you're ready. We won't pressure you." Soon the other kids stood up and the hug became a group hug.

 

A few weeks passed but the thoughts inside Chan's head were slowly eating him. He couldn't concentrate anymore and that's when he slammed his face on the table, frustrated by what he was thinking. Too bad that he was in the library and everyone looked at him, some people were confused, some were mad, others were angry but most of them gave him a sympathetic look, after all it was exams period so they just assumed he was stressed over the exams he was preparing.  
Woojin was sitting beside him like always and he gave Chan a puzzled look. He quietly collected his stuffs and motioned the younger guy to do the same, this time it was Chan's turn to look at him confused but he didn't ask anything and just collected his things before throwing them inside his backpack. They made their way out of the library and Chan exhaled loudly.  
"Chan..." Woojin called his name, his tone was very gentle.  
"Sorry hyung I didn't mean to make a lot of noise it's just that exams and you know and-" Chan tried to explain, he didn't know why he suddenly felt nervous.  
"Chan Chan relax ehy, look at me. I know it's not about exams. I know you, you're not like this during exam period. But for now wanna go to the bubble tea shop? You can tell me what's really bothering you. And no I don't want any lies, I'll know if you lie" Chan was surprised by Woojin's words. How can the guy know him so well? Yes they were close but Woojin was definitely closer to Hyunjin while Chan was closer to Changbin and Jisung thanks to the small hiphop group they made.  
While they were walking to the bubble tea shop Chan kept glancing at Woojin.  
As soon as they entered one of the staff immediately recognized them.  
"Ehy Chan hyung, Woojin hyung! The usual?" He asked while smiling brightly.  
"Ehy Jungwoo and yes please!" Woojin smiled back before leading Chan to their usual spot.  
Chan slid on the sit in front of Woojin who was busy on his phone and for the first time Chan properly looked at the slightly older guy.  
Woojin wasn't as beautiful like Minho and Hyunjin, he wasn't as cute as Seungmin and Jeongin nor as manly as Changbin, he didn't have a mischievous look like Jisung and Felix but somehow right now Chan found Woojin perfect.  
Chan wasn't exactly sure what made him perfect in his eyes.  
Maybe it was his nose that he had the urge to bop right on his small mole. Maybe it was his eyes, he didn't have double eyelids but for Chan they still looked beautiful because Woojin always had this soft but mature gaze.  
Woojin was too busy to notice Chan staring at him and the youngest was just fine with that, it meant he had more time to admire the oldest without getting caught. The more he looked at Woojin the more he had the urge to get closer to see every single detail of his face, he wanted to memorize everything and engrave it in his mind.  
Chan shook his head.  
He was starting to borderline sound creepy and was really thankful when Jungwoo came to their table with their order.  
"Earl grey bubble tea for Woojin hyung and taro with extra bubbles for Chan hyung" the waiter smiled as he placed the drinks down. "Call me if you need anything and enjoy!" Chan looked at him leave before shifting his attention back to Woojin who was now stirring his drink with a black straw. He watched as Woojin started drinking.  
"Hyung I think I'm gay" Chan said, of course Woojin almost choked on his drink and he should have expected such reaction but Chan still panicked and didn't know what to do, he was sure that if he was texting he'd write a keyboard smash but this was real life and all he could think about now was to grab some tissues and that's what he did then he aimed to wipe Woojin's lips but that made him panic even more and he just let go of the tissues mid action making them fall inside Woojin's drink.  
"Hyung I'm sorry!" He was worried, he never planned to come out and this was definitely not how he imagined things to go. The more seconds were passing by the more he felt his heart clenching and the fact that Woojin was just sitting in front of him, eyes wide opened a shocked expression painted on his face with the tissues still in his drink made Chan even more anxious.  
Anxious that one of his closest friends would be disappointed of him but everything crumbled down when Woojin closed his eyes then slowly opened them as his lips curled upwards forming one of his signature warm smiles.  
"Are you disappointed?" Chan asked, his gaze falling onto his laps.  
"No, I expected it in a way" Woojin's reply surprised Chan who immediately looked up and searched for any sign that would tell him Woojin was lying but he couldn't find anything. "Mayhaps Mina told me why she broke up with you when she came into the library without you. I'm not disappointed that you didn't tell us though, that's something you had to figure out yourself and all I could do was to wait until you realised it and decided to come out. I'm not going to judge you either, everyone in our group of friends is gay only you and Jeongin were the straight ones, well Jeonginnie is bi and I guess you are too now unless you are actually gay and that's fine." Woojin explained everything with a calm tone while he removed the soaked tissue from his drink. Chan just stared at him but when Woojin looked directly into his eyes he felt his face heating up and he was pretty sure his ears were as red as tomatoes.  
"What made you finally realise it though?" Asked Woojin, he took a sip of his bubble tea and slowly chew the tapioca balls in his mouth.  
Chan wanted to say 'you' but he was too scared to say it out loud.

 

Chan wasn't sure how many months passed by since that afternoon where he confessed he was gay to Woojin  
He wasn't sure where he found the strenght to come out to the rest of his friends and his family.  
He wasn't sure where he found the strenght to change his major and moving from business to music.  
Everything was so different now but if there was one thing he was really sure of it was that he was happy.  
He was finally happy that his life was going to the direction he liked.  
His new course was difficult but he loved it so much he actually found the strenght to keep going and the immense support he received from his friends and family helped him a lot.

"Channie what are you doing?" Woojin soft voice caught Chan's attention and he prayed that the warm he was feeling inside his chest wasn't visible on his face but his prayers were not heard at all and he could feel the heat spread from his chest up to his face and ears. Woojin of course had to make it worse by gently placing his palm on the younger's forehead.  
"Do you have a fever? Why are you so red?" He asked while frowning and Chan felt like dying inside.  
"Ah no hyung it's just really hot today"  
"Chan it's February and it's -3°C"  
"I just ran you know ehm p.e."  
"Don't you have music class on last period?"  
"I ran here-"  
"We're literally in front of your class..."  
"I-"  
"Are you hiding something from me?" Woojin raised an eyebrow and Chan just wanted to become really small and disappear but he suddenly felt an arm wrap around his free one, he turned around surprised just to see his ex girlfriend standing beside him.  
"M-Mina?!" He not very manly squeaked.  
"Hello Chan, Woojin. Is it okay if I steal him from you? I need to talk with him" Woojin nooded and waved his hand before leaving.  
"Uh what's going on?" Chan asked confused.  
"I need an advice" Mina said while pulling him out of the college grounds.  
"About..?"  
"I think I like someone." Chan blinked more confused than before.  
"Okay and? What do you need from me? "  
"I need your help to make her jealous"  
"Whoa whoa wait did you just say her??" Chan stopped walking and almost made Mina trip.  
"Yeah shocking, breaking news I'm lesbian." She rolled her eyes letting go of the guy and made her way to a near park, Chan jogged a little to catch up with her.  
"Who's the lucky girl?" He grinned.  
"Her name is Chaeyoung and she's in your friend's Changbin class. He was actually the one to introduce us."  
'And you need my help because..?"  
"You know I'm shy right? She's the opposite, she's pretty strong and charismatic and always tease me. Sometimes I feel like she's the older one between us. For once I just want to ne the one to tease her."  
"And you thought of making her feel jealous? Will it even work? How are you even planning on doing that?" Chan tilted his head just smiled and walked closer to him before whispering: "Don't be too obvious but she actually followed us and is hiding behind the tree right on your left. She knows we've dated before and doesn't like when I mention you in our conversations." Mina glanced behind his back and Chan heard someone stepping loudly on the snow.  
"She's doing a really poor job at hiding. So what do you want us to do?"  
"Hmm nothing much let's just walk around and talk normally" They both nodded and made their way to the nearest bench.  
"So how have you been? I heard you changed major?" The former couple started to catch up a little until Mina asked something that made Chan blush.  
"So Woojin and you, uh?" She smiled softly.  
"What about us?"  
"Oh so there's an us? I was right the whole time!" She clapped her hands excitedly.  
"What? No there's no us! We are just friends!" Chan shook his head and Mina pouted.  
"Ehh? After all this time and everything I've done you're still just friends??"  
"What-?"  
"Chan you've liked Woojin for so long I can't believe you haven't done anything!" She exhaled loudly as zhe leaned agaist the cold bench.  
"Channie, what do you like about Woojin?" Her voice was soft like always but her tone was different, it was more firm and serious and it actually prompted Chan to deeply think of a right answer.  
A couple of silent seconds later he replied.

"Honestly? Everything. The way he smiles and shows his cute teeth. The way he laughs. The way he's always there to encourage anyone that's feeling down. The way he looks so serious while he does his homework. The way his eyes softens every time he sees a cute dog in the street. The way his eyes shine and voice raise up a little when he talks about choir. The way his arms wraps around my body to give me one of his signiture bear hugs.I like so many things about it and I've only realised them all now. After we broke up he was the one there for me and even though it was really subtle he always made sure that I was okay, that I wasn't feeling alone. He's always been there for me. He is always so carying, not only to me but to everyone in our group. He's so... so perfect" He exhaled contented as a smiling Woojin appeared in his mind. His little monologue helped him let out some of the thoughts he was too afraid to express and in a way he was happy that Mina asked him.  
"Channie goodluck with him. I really hope it will work out well for you two" Mina said, the two ex lovers looked at each other and smiled. Even though they were not dating anymore they knew they were still friends and would be there for each other.

Chan knew Woojin's schedule, he memorized it just like he memorized the rest of his group of friends schedules right at the beginning of the semester because his father instincts kicked in and wanted to make sure everyone had time to eat, rest and have fun with each other.  
Chan sprinted to Woojin's last class right when the final bell of the day rang. He wanted to hang out together with the slightly older guy and he hoped Woojin would agree. He guessed luck was on his side that day, in fact Woojin accepted his invitation and they were now going to the arcade. It was one of their favorite spots to go to after lessons where they could relax, have fun but also let out the frustrations of the day.  
They played a lot of games, each round being fiercer than the last one, as a bet was placed right before they started: the loser had to pay for their snacks.  
Woojin was pretty good at everything and his laughter was enough to distract Chan. Now Chan was never a bad loser, he always aced anything and everything he wanted to but Woojin kept distracting him even though said guy wasn't aware of it.  
Woojin with a final click on the tekken machine game killed Chan's character. He stood up and danced around shaking his fists in the air, Chan wanted to pout for loosing but Woojin's happy expression made him smile as well.  
"So my king, what shall I buy you?" He stood up as well and jokingly bowed making Woojin chuckle.  
"My king? Now that's a nice nickname. Hmmmm I want froyo!" He beamed and the two boys made their way to the froyo place just in front of the arcade place. They snapped a couple of pictures together and Chan was genuinely happy to spend some time with Woojin alone.

Winter slowly passed by and Spring came. The snow on the street was already a memory of the past and it was now replaced with fallen cherry blossoms petals. The weather was not cold anymore but in Chan's room it was as if it was still the middle of Winter.  
Two figures were cuddled together under a blanket while watching the latest animated movie on a computer placed in front of them.  
"Woojin can we pause for a second I need to pee" Chan wiggled his way out of Woojin's arms immediately regretting it, the warmth feeling that surrounded him until now slowly fading away. He tried to do his business as quick as possible but when he came back he was met with a sleeping Woojin. He smiled at the sight, he took his laptop and placed in on his desk, he slid back inside the blanket and snuggled closer to Woojin. They've done it before, ever since their hang out in the arcade the two boys spent more and more time together. At some point they started to hang out in each other's rooms too where they would watch movies and cuddle. They also both liked to take pictures and thanks to a polaroid camera that Seungmin gave to Chan on his last birthday the two '97 guys were able to capture all their hang outs, Chan would keep each picture, ticket, even bills in a box under his bed and each time he added a new item he hoped that wasn't the last time.

"Seriously hyung you need to stop this. If you keep this up our entire discography will consist of sappy love songs dedicated to Woojin hyung" Jisung whined and kicked his legs around. Changbin exhaled loudly while placing another written love song on a pile next to Chan who was blushing pretty hard.  
"When will you find the guts to finally confess? Even Jisung and I did it and you know Felix and Minho are dumb and dumber. If we could do it so can you!" Changbin sat down on a swirling chair turning on his laptop before furiously tapping on it.  
Chan massaged his temples. It's been months, summer break was almost there but he still hadn't found the courage to confess to Woojin.  
He did try a couple of times.  
He tried on Woojin's surprise birthday party that he organised. He tried on their year batch spring field trip to Jeju Island. He even tried during Seungmin and Hyunjin first anniversary small celebratory party. He did try but each time Woojin's perfect smile stopped him.

Summer was finally there and the group of 9 guys decided to spend a weekend together before separating and going back to each other's hometown to spend time with old friends and families.  
They decided to go to Nami Island. Although Autumn was the perfect season to go there Summer was the only free time they all really shared together without extra curricular stuffs or homework in between.  
After a long bus drive they decided to split into two groups, 6 of them were going using the zip line while 3 of them were going to go by ferry to reach the island.  
Woojin and Jeongin were the first one to go followed by Chan and Minho.  
While on the zipline Chan felt adrenaline pumping through his veins and he guessed that's where he found the strenght to shout "WOOJIN I LOVE YOU"  
When he got off of the ride he was really thankful that no one heard him but he had to stab Minho's ribcage with his elbow because he apparently heard Chan shouting Woojin's voice.  
They spent the day exploring the island taking fun pictures and buying supplies for their bbq and dinner. Chan was once again in charge of grilling the meat with Hyunjin, the two were the most responsible and could cook the meat without burning the whole place. Woojin would have helped but that would have meant leaving the youngest kids with Changbin and Minho and they all knew no one listened nor followed the two older guys.  
"Channie hyung I think you should confess to Woojin hyung tomorrow. Or at least before we go back to Seoul." Hyunjin nonchalantly said while flipping a piece of meat on the grill.  
"I was planning to do that but I'm scared Hyunjinnie, what if he rejects me and I make not only this trip but our whole friendship awkward? That would also put you guys in an odd situation" Chan was starting to overthink again and it was reflected by the flames suddenly getting higher.  
"Hyung relax. I'm sure Woojin likes you too and okay let's say he hits his head and rejects you, he would never let your confession ruin your friendship nor our group bonding. I hope you confess hyung, I'm sure you won't regret it." Hyunjin tried to reassure him.  
"Ehy Chan!" Woojin's head suddenly popped out from the door "Felix told me to tell you to throw some shrimps on the barbie or something like that" Chan's tension disappeared and a small chuckle appeared on his lips. He had to thank Felix later because seeing or well hearing Woojin say a very aussie slang phrase with his awkward english accent was really cute to him.

Hyunjin's words ran in his head all night but they also gave him the strenght to finally do it. He was now back to the grocery shop where a small flower shop section was, he was with Minho and Seungmin. Both had experience on confessing using flowers so they were there to guide him on choosing the right flowers and colours.  
"What's Woojin hyung's favorite flower?" Asked Seungmin as he checked an already made bouquet.  
"He once said it constantly changes but for now it's multicolored daisies" Chan recalled that day. The two just woke up in Chan's room and were cuddling when Chan suddenly asked that question out of the blue.  
"Okay we could ask for a bouquet with daisies hmm chrysanthemums and maybe throw some statice and babies breath." Minho suggested, the lady helping him find said flowers and Chan nodded in approval.  
After that they decided to buy a box of ferrero rocher and although Chan's wallet was crying from the expensive chocolate he knew Woojin was going to be delighted to have a box of his favorite chocolate.  
When they were done they called the others and they quickly went to where they were.  
When Chan arrived he saw Woojin snapping some pictures at the tall trees that were famous all around the world for the spectacular scenario they created. It was also a really hot spot for couples to confess or snap pictures together. Minho quietly motioned all the younger kids to leave the unsuspecting Woojin alone and when they were far enough Seungmin slightly pushed Chan toward Woojin before running to where the others were.  
Chan took a deep breath. This was it. It was finally time to confess.  
He looked as Woojin's broad shoulders and slowly walked to him, the bouquet and chocolate box hidden behind his back. Sweat was starting to fall on  
the sides of his forehead, his heart was beating so hard he was surprised no one else could hear it. He suddenly wanted ro run but Woojin turned around, a lost expression painted on his face. After all he thought the kids were all behind him but when he turned the teenagers were replaced by a very nervous looking Chan.  
"Chan? Are you okay were are the others?" He slightly tilted his head and Chan thought thag if he wasn't about to die right there and then he would have pinched the older's cheeks.  
"C Chan?" He whispered uncertain. Said guy took a deep breathe and closed his eyes before exhaling and slowly opening his eyes just to be meet with an even more confused Woojin.  
"Woojinnie I need to tell you something but please don't... don't interrupt me and let me finish, yeah?" Woojin nodded and Chan took it as a sign to go on.  
"Woojin you've always been one of my closest friend. You've always been there for me, you listened to me when I needed someone to talk with, you held my hand when I was lost and you hugged me when I felt like I was alone. You've seen so many sides of me and each day spent with you were the most beautiful and happiest ones in my life. You gave me the strenght to stand up and walk again all those months ago when I felt like my whole world was crumbling down. You were the first one to stop and really ask me if I was okay. You've always been so caring, loving and and what I really want to say is that I like you. I really do like you a lot Woojin and I hope you can accept my feelings." Chan brought the bouquet of flowers and chocolate box in front of him as he closed his eyes too afraid to see Woojin's reaction.  
A few seconds passed by and Chan was starting to panic but a sudden sniffle made him open his eyes just to be greeted with a crying Woojin who was desperately trying to wipe away his tears.  
"W Wojin?" And this time it was Chan who looked at the older lossed.  
"Channie y you don't even know how long I've been waiting for you to say that. I like you too! I like you so much!" He cried out and lunched himself to Chan who quickly wrapped his arms around Woojin's figure.  
Chan blinked once, twice, three times but then Woojin cupped his cheeks, their eyes meeting for a brief moment before they slowly closed and the spaces between their lips disappeared. They met halfway and when their lips touched Chan wanted to cry. Woojin's lips tasted like sweet strawberries mixed with his salty tears. The kiss was gentle but they both could feel all the emotions being exchanged. Small fireworks exploding inside their hearts but also a warm sense of familiarity wrapping around them.  
It was perfect.  
They were perfect together.  
When they pulled away they looked at each other, they could see the love they felt reflected into each other's eyes.  
Bright smiles adorned their lips and a new glow could be seen on them.  
They heard whistles and shouts from their friends, they knew they were going to get teased like hell later but it was okay because now they were finally together and as Woojin took the chocolate box and held Chan's hand they knew that they were going to stay together for a really long time and they were happy about it.

Chan wasn't sure he loved a lot of things.  
He wasn't sure he loved the course he was majoring in.  
He wasn't sure he loved the colour his hair was.  
He wasn't sure he loved the place he stayed at.  
He wasn't sure he loved the boring routine he followed.

Six months later and Chan finally found his place. He changed everything that used to suffocate him and now he was holding the hand of the love of his life and for the first time he was genuinely happy for everything that happened.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't really know what or why I wrote this. But eagan ehy if you see this then surprise? This is for you uwu.  
> I hope y'all enjoyed this mess please leave a comment of kudos and let me know if you liked it or not oof.


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